Reincarnation, on Dictionary.com is defined as “the belief that the soul, upon death of the body, comes back to earth in another body or form.” Metaphysical inconsequential crap aside, generally speaking, I’m willing to bet my breasts that you probably aren’t going to witness a reincarnation in this lifetime — not to add insult to injury to any MJ fans crossing their fingers. In fact, never mind reincarnation, I’ll go as far as saying you’ll be lucky if you live to see the beginning and end of most things, except maybe the house plant, the house pet or the “house” desktop computer. But then again, I’m not generally speaking. In fact, I’m specifically speaking to those born and bred in the ’80s. If that’s you, read on. If it’s not, well then this is may be inconsequential crap to you, or hopefully, just a good heads up. We will be witnessing a reincarnation by 2010. Winnipeggers, we may have to wait a little bit longer for it to get here, but it’s coming, I promise. If you were born in the ‘80s like myself, you’re witnessing your first time full-circle and the characteristic of the phoenix — the resurrection of the good old ‘80s.
The ‘80s, like many of my ex-boyfriends, should not be forgiven, and however hard you try, seemingly cannot be forgotten. And like an old boyfriend or an old Pat Benatar track, the ‘80s are easy to love, and easier to hate. I mean, it’s hard not to love the year you were born, the most overdone costume party theme, the amazing family sitcoms that not even TBS can rerun the shit out of, and musicians that got music on the map, like Michael and Madonna. Again, the idea of people in LA Gear, up late, dancing off beat to Dionne Warwick, or the year your frisky parents got pregnant with you, might compensate for the hate, as part of the love-hate phenomenon that the eighties invoke. In the end, whether you resent or rejoice, the ‘80s are back in a big way. You can send your thank you cards to fashion designers Marc Jacobs, Miss Sixty, Balmain, twenty8twelve, Gucci and Donatella Versace who have all put their noodles and needles together, in a rebellious Breakfast Club-esque attempt to initiate a revival. It’s safe to say, their 2009, and 2010 collections are definitely forgivable. The ‘80s trends that weave in and out of all of their collections are showcasing snakeskin, futuristic sharp-as-sheet metal shoulder padding, lace, lace and leather, more lace, layered with more leather, shredded denim, acid-washed anything, no-animosity animal prints, 10 lbs-plus necklaces, hikeable-likeable short and shiny miniskirts — leggings and even metallics are busting out of storage. Forget everything your mom ever told you about blue eye shadow. The cherry on top: heels or boots (you choose) all higher than the temperature.
So to all you “1980s” out there, enjoy your second go, and if you weren’t so lucky to be a part, here is your chance. It will be here soon and it won’t stay long because fashion reincarnations are usually faster than a total eclipse (of the heart).