For those in relationships, Valentine’s Day might mean sappy cards, heart-shaped chocolates and candlelit dinners. Unfortunately, for those who are not, it is a day of watching others celebrate something they do not have — romantic love.
At this time of the year, I always see melodramatic social media posts from people lamenting their singlehood and dreading the romantic holiday.
This phenomenon appears to be part of a growing trend. According to Statistics Canada, marriage rates in Canada have been declining and the number of single-person households are on the rise, suggesting that singlehood is becoming more common. Similarly, in the U.S., the number of unpartnered adults aged 25 to 54 increased from 29 per cent in 1990 to 38 per cent in 2019.
However, Valentine’s Day does not have to be as dreadful for singles as some people make it out to be. It can be an opportunity to practice other forms of love. This week, staff and volunteers at the Student Wellness Centre are hosting a number of events, from crafting workshops to a UMFM radio podcast with Active Minds on self-love.
Ashley Anderson, the student wellness program assistant at U of M, said the crafting event is centered around students making Valentine’s Day cards for themselves.
“This is a great way to practice self-compassion and care, especially during a time of year that can feel lonely (and stressful),” she wrote in an email.
Anderson added that self-care can make Valentine’s Day easier and that there are many ways to practice it.
“Some [practices] include ordering in or making your favourite food, doing a ‘spa’ night (e.g., face masks, bubble bath), watching your favourite movie or show or simply relaxing/taking a nap. Additionally, Valentine’s Day falls on the Friday before a long weekend and reading week this year, so taking an entire night off of school/studying is more feasible,” she said.
“Another great option is to get together with other friends who are single and/or do not celebrate to take your mind off the time of year and have much needed support.”
Reframing Valentine’s Day around platonic love is not unusual. In some Latin American cultures, Feb. 14 is also known as el día del amor y la amistad — the day of love and friendship — and is celebrated by spending time with friends and family. In El Salvador, people exchange secret gifts with each other, similar to secret Santa during Christmas.
Interestingly, there are days dedicated to single people. The National Day Calendar marks Feb. 15 as Singles Awareness Day, a celebration of singlehood and its benefits. In South Korea, singles wear black and eat jjajangmyeon (noodles in black bean sauce) together on Apr. 14, perhaps as a way to find community in a world filled with rom-coms and love songs.
Regardless of your relationship status, this Friday is an excellent opportunity to express our love toward the people we cherish — and, perhaps more importantly, toward ourselves.
Find more details about the referenced Valentine’s Day themed events by following @healthyuofm on Instagram or by visiting healthyuofm.com/swc/
