I have always been an exceptionally average person. My grades were always mediocre at best, always obtaining either Bs or Cs so much, so my motto became “Cs get degrees.”
I was never picked first for dodgeball or stood out in a crowded room. I often blended in with the shadows in the back, being happy to be hidden but envious of those who could garner attention either with academics or a bubbly personality.
I struggled mentally with the inability to achieve the social status I wanted or those As I could not reach no matter the effort I put into an assignment. Assignments became a point of avoidance for me because if I could not match up to the standard I wanted, why even try?
I became reclusive, making up excuses to friends as to why I could not go out with them. I started procrastinating every assignment till the last moment as a form of self-sabotage to the point that there was no way I could even get an average grade with the amount of time I put into my schoolwork.
The immense pressure that students feel to find a clique in university is crippling. University was not like the movies. I was not going out every night, and I struggled to find friends. I found myself thinking that everyone had it figured out except for me.
The Canadian Journal of Psychiatry evaluated the mental health among post-secondary students in Canada, finding that there is a mental health crisis among students enrolled in Canadian universities. The journal asserted that there is a rise in mood and anxiety disorders among the general student population, and although there are more mental health diagnoses among students, the resources and treatment for treating mental health-related issues are limited.
Throughout my university experience, I can say my mental health was most definitely linked to the grades I was receiving. When I received an average grade, I felt worthless and less than. I hid my defeat and crumbling mental health issues behind a humorous façade. I associated with friends whose GPAs were much higher than my own, creating a form of imposter syndrome. Although I was doing averagely well in university, I could not shake the feeling that I did not deserve to be here.
Universities often foster unhealthy competition between students, pitting students against each other to maintain a sense of prestige within faculties. I concur that this unhealthy competition between students is one of the major reasons why there is a mental health crisis.
The U of M creates an environment based on competition as a way for students to academically challenge one another. Although the U of M promotes an atmosphere based on challenging one another, it is a form of snakes and ladders where you hope your competitors fall so you can reach the top.
The University of Southern California researchers found that the pressure from having students engage in competitions increases the odds of college students developing anxiety by 70 percent and depression by 40 percent.
According to the American Psychology Association, the desire to succeed is initially a positive reinforcement to get into a good school or attain good grades, but it is ultimately detrimental to mental health as one tries to shape oneself into a concept of moulded perfection.
The obsession with perfectionism is an unhealthy trait pushed on students by post-secondary institutions and a social culture where appearance, grades and social status are everything. This idea of perfectionism is an idea that has students striving for this idea of “perfect” that simply does not exist. Perfectionism has an unhealthy connection to fear of failure and an unhealthy relation to self-criticism.
Through my years with the U of M, I found myself striving for the concept of perfection less and less. This came about through extensive counselling sessions and the assurance that although I was not perfect, I did not have to be.
The correlation between grades and one’s real-life potential is not computable. The concept of standardized testing does not equate to self-worth. Being average is not death but actual self-liberation. We should value progress over perfectionism, which is not attainable or healthy.
Being average allows one to progress in things they are passionate about rather than forcing perfection on something that is not attainable. Perhaps the pressure to conform to social standards and the crippling fear of failure will be alleviated by embracing mediocracy.