Dear Santa

Dear Santa,
I know it’s been a long time since I made the “nice” list. I just thought that maybe the statute of limitations on my more heinous actions may have run out by now. So here, on the off chance that I may have made it to the good side of the ledger — or that your Alzheimer’s disease has progressed to the point that you have forgotten those transgressions — is my Christmas wish list.
1. A new prime minister. I know the one we have is still functioning, but I just would like one that knows what the words “history of colonization” actually mean.
2. Guaranteed access to post-secondary education for all who truly cannot afford it. I don’t mean free university. That would be the stuff of fairy tales and, let’s face it, you are not about fairy tales. I just would like to see students who work hard and who are struggling financially and whose parents are not able to pay their tuition to be given a chance to get their degree without crippling debt.
3. A realization by our society that prevention of crime does not rest solely in the “more boots on the street” mentality that seems all too pervasive in the minds of our politicians.
4. A trip to Cuba. I know it’s not as altruistic as the previous ones, but you need to forgive a guy for wanting a little something for himself.
5. Spine/testicles for Barack Obama. “Yes we can” is beginning to remind me of my mother’s grammatical corrections when I would ask for ice cream. I guess the slogan should have Yes we may? Seriously, biggest mandate in years, historical opportunity to cash in on mountains of political capital and we are still hearing them argue about public options and exit strategies?
6. H1N1 vaccines for everyone!!
7. Fewer anti-Ignatieff commercials. The guy digs his own grave well enough.
8. A Blue Bomber coach who doesn’t seem to have borderline personality disorder.
9. A realization on the part of provincial politicians that the best way to deal with issues of gangs and other “inner city” issues is to actually pay the people working with the kids in those areas more than we pay the guy at Jiffy Lube.
10. The ability for everyone, no matter who they are or where they live, to find some time over the holiday seasons to give thanks for what they have and to give back to those have less.
I know these things are harder to pack than an iPhone or a PS3, but see what you and your elves can come up with.

Signed,
Stephen Milner