I’ve always been a yearner. I’ve yearned for a well-paying job, a stable income, an extra in a baker’s dozen box of goodies — but primarily I’ve always yearned for human connection. 

For most of my youth and for a good chunk of my early twenties I was single, this wasn’t something I was ashamed of or particularly bothered by. 

I had a desire to fall in love, sure. My heart was always beating over several secret affections and crushes that I kept to myself, but they were desires that either faded over time or that I was too afraid to act on.

The feeling of someone having such an effect on you though — it’s that experience that I lived off of for a really long time, happily. 

Writing secret love letters to your paramour, making playlists they’ll never see or soaking up every little encounter you had — the intimacy of being alone but being in love and having been changed by it is magical.  

Loving like this was a way to not only understand them better, but myself as well.

Of course, things inevitably changed. Eventually I swallowed my fear, and my current partner now receives all my not-so-secret love letters and tokens of affection.

But it took time, which is simultaneously important and unimportant.

Love, romance, dating — every person on this planet is able to love and be loved in return, it’s just a matter of time, so why rush?

For this playlist, I wanted to celebrate other yearners out there. I wanted to make something for the ones who celebrate Valentine’s Day alone, keeping secret love letters in a box tucked away, and for the lovers who take their time. 

Here, we have fourteen tracks of the indie and indie-adjacent variety. Several of these songs were introduced to me by my partner or come from early playlists I made for my partner. 

Others are pulled from a time when I was still a full-time romance dreamer. 

So enjoy and remember: “True Love Will Find You in The End.”

 

Eat, Sleep, Wake (Nothing but You) — Bombay Bicycle Club, Everything Else Has Gone Wrong 

So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings — Caroline Polachek, Pang 

Shut Up Kiss Me — Angel Olsen, MY WOMAN

Real Love Baby — Father John Misty, Real Love Baby 

Fade Into You — Mazzy Star, So Tonight That I Might See

Just Like Heaven — The Cure, Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me, 

Luna — 2011 Remaster — The Smashing Pumpkins, Siamese Dream (Deluxe Edition) 

Crush — Ethel Cain, Inbred

VCR — The xx, xx

I Would Do Anything For You — Foster The People, Torches

Anyone Else But You — The Moldy Peaches, The Moldy Peaches

Sea of Love — Cat Power, The Covers Record

Make Out in My Car (Sufjan Stevens Version) — Moses Sumney and Sufjan Stevens, Make Out in My Car: Chameleon Suite

True Love Will Find You in The End — Daniel Johnston, Retired Boxer