People are dying all around me. Food is scarce, water sources are undrinkable and running out. Winter is about to hit us hard. There are huddled masses and garbage as far as the eye can see. It smells like shit anywhere you go, although I can’t say that I have moved very much in the past week, except to a cave up in the hills where I get my writing done. I’m starving and I haven’t gotten any closer to Christ since I crossed the state border into Utah. I have been rationing my food for over a week now and I fear I am starting to lose my mind. Maybe writing will take my mind away from the gravity of the situation around me and give me the strength to persevere through my journey.

People tried to scavenge all they could once they realized that they were on their own and no one could help them but themselves. But all the rows upon rows of corn, all the cattle, all the hogs that have been left to stand in the fields along the highways aren’t fit for human consumption. People have tried eating the corn, the cows, the hogs, but it only makes you sick. Who the fuck actually knows how to prepare food? Every fast food joint off of the interstate was raided for whatever food they had left. Only in this instance, thankfully, people with the skills to prepare the food were not hard to come by. The burgers and fries keep remarkably well and are the only food sources that might last the winter for the lucky souls who were able to get their hands on the stuff. I’ve been keeping two McDonald’s pies in my glove box and they still look as they did the day I found them a month ago. I’m just choked that they are rhubarb and not apple (what a shitty promotional flavour).

The outlook is grim. There is no military anymore, there is no economy. There is no aid coming. How would it get here? Who would provide it? There is no way in or out and nobody to provide any aid. People can hardly move in any direction, can’t turn around to leave. There are hordes of people right behind you, here for the same reason you are. And there is only one man who can really help us in our time of crisis, but we have no chance of surviving long enough to see him. Everybody put their normal lives on hold and stopped whatever they were doing to come to Provo only to find that they were already too late.

I’ve never experienced this kind of chaos. Opening night at Investors Group Field in my hometown (the Taylor Swift concert, not the One Heart celebration) was nothing compared to this. I remember my old man took me to see Taylor Swift for my birthday. I laugh when I think how our voices were so hoarse the next day. Not from cheering for Taylor, no. But from screeching and taking the Lord’s name in vain the whole time we were trying to get out of the parking lot. Only difference is that people eventually made it out of the parking lot and nobody died going to see Taylor Swift.

I was a fool to think that I could make it to Provo by car so late after his coming. I will never understand why he returned in Provo, Utah of all places, or even the States for that matter (I have no idea how resurrection works). I guess he could have returned anywhere, really. They must have gotten something right at Brigham Young. Maybe Max Hall could’ve provided insight about his alma mater if we hadn’t cut his ass.

Naturally, it took a while for people to be convinced that he had actually returned. It wasn’t uncommon before the return to find any nut on the street claiming to be your Lord and saviour. But this time, it was the real thing. Any miracle they said he could do, he did. When the media was still a thing, everyone was talking about the man in Provo, Utah who could walk on water, turn water into wine, but most importantly, heal the sick. And that’s when the proverbial shit hit the fan. As if the economy wasn’t bad enough. When he came back, the economy really went to shit. People everywhere quit their jobs to travel to Utah. Who would want to be in the military, work for a septic company, or pick up garbage in a glorious time like this? Everybody was too over the moon to give a shit, which is probably why there’s garbage everywhere and the smell of shit in the air. We were waiting for somebody else to solve our problems and our salvation finally showed up.

Nobody was turned away when they got to the States. Who knows how many people are in Utah right now. Billions, at least. Who knew that everybody was sick or in need of a shepherd? Of course, it was mostly the people who needed a shepherd and had the money to get to Utah in the first place who made it into Provo before anybody else. Most of the people who really need saving are now doomed to the obscurity of the highways, dying from exposure because there are no medical services available anymore. I think I am witnessing the largest-scale humanitarian crisis of all time unfold before my very eyes.

The sun is beginning to set and I’m getting too cold to write. But more importantly, I have a rhubarb pie calling my name from a glove box.

Until next time.

 

UPDATE!

While I was writing, some asshole broke into my car and stole both of my pies.